Case of the Terribles: Leisure Suits for the Modern Gal

GUYS.  Gone are the days of mere Juicy Couture leisure suits which posited "JUICY" on a wearers derrière, or the subsequent poseurs which posed statements like "SEXY" or "ENJOY THE VIEW," in bright fonts or rhinestones for the brave.

Let me introduce you to the only leisure suit you need for 2016.  It's a mere $400, which is chump change to look so flawlessly relaxed and leisurely!  It comes from the crazies who are steering JCrew directly into an iceberg!  That worked out really well for Leo and Kate, so you know they're onto something.

Behold, Collection Drake's for JCrew Green Bengal Tiger Pant and Top!

WERK. IT. GURL.

You Havisham in style!

Rarrrrrrrr.  In case you need translation, that's a lion noise in support of this fierce feline family member inspired prowling suit.  You go get it, you fierce cougars!

In case you were wondering how to wear it, here's the handy product guide:

Oh, I'm thinking nights out all right.  I mean, who can resist a silk elastic waisted pant that you have to dry clean?

Practical!

Steal art, not books! (Actually, steal neither): The Last Painting of Sara de Vos, by Dominic Smith

http://us.macmillan.com/

The Last Painting of Sara de Vos

Dominic Smith

Sarah Crighton Books: Farrar, Straus, and Girox, 2016

ISBN: 9780374106683

I’ve mentioned before that I’m a wee smidge bit fascinated by art theft. The definition of wee smidge bit in this case could also be defined as “crazy enough to have a would-steal hit list.” But can you blame me? That art is mesmerizing, and I grew up in a city with a ridiculous unsolved art heist! This, I believe, probably played a small role in my decision to initially major in art history when I started college (just yesterday guys, it wasn’t over a decade ago or anything…). It was a fling that didn’t last for practical reasons, but we’ve kept a small flame burning as part-time lovers. The initial tete a tete lasted a course or two long enough to leave me with lasting curiosity, appreciation, and the sense that had I stayed the course, I may have specialized in Flemish works. Those colors, you guys!

The plot to The Last Painting of Sara de Vos, therefore, is right up my alley. Flemish painting? Check. Stolen painting? Check. Forged painting? Check. Spanning centuries, decades, continents? Check. Female painters? Ummm...rare and wonderful check, please. Did I mention I really enjoy art theft stories yet? So yeah, I RSVP’d yes to this party, and I wasn’t disappointed by anything but a lack of an explanation as to how said thefting actually went down, but you know what? The rest is pretty solid, and has bonus meta-con-artistry, beautiful imagery, adeptly drawn characters, clear yet elegant language, the timeless sense of a piece of masterful art, and a patina of mystery. Because it is summer and I don't want your brains to rot,  I'm assigning you a grown up book with some big words.  And because the publisher description is what grabbed me and there's some sun I want to get after, I am sharing that below!

DIY not let yourself be charmed by a makeshift bride? Something New, by Lucy Knisley

http://images.macmillan.com/folio-assets/

Something New: tales of a makeshift bride

Lucy Knisley

First Second, 2016

ISBN: 9781626722491

Legend tells of a time in the lives of those of a certain age in all the lands of the worlds (all of them). I imagine that age, location, and customs are society specific, but I also imagine that all of us who choose a life outside of hermitage encounter and experience what I’ve taken to calling “the Bubble.” Specifically, TheWeddingBubble.  In meteorology and virology I believe this is called a cluster event, except hopefully in the case of TheWeddingBubble, there’s at least 75% less tornadoes and norovirus (actually maybe 100%, really).  It’s not necessarily a one time event either - like seltzer or champagne (this is about a wedding book, after all!), one can have many bubbles.  

Abandon ye pride, prejudice, panty twisting - this one is super eligible for your Summer Reading List: Eligible, by Curtis Sittenfeld

Eligible

Curtis Sittenfeld

Random House, 2016

ISBN: 978-1400068326

Review copy provided by NetGalley

My delight in British costume dramas, Jane Austen, and smutty books is, well, not a secret.  I’m not known to miss a BBC show on PBS involving long skirts, repressed and eventually unrepressable feels (yeah, I know it’s not a word, but try and pretend like you don’t know what I meant), drama of a sensibly British nature, and smoldering male leads in tight pants and long coats. If you’ve been paying attention, you also know well my love for ridiculous smutty books, as well as a good old case of the terribles.  Pretty much forever, Mrs. Bennet has been my all-time favorite unintentional Austen heroine (sorry Anne Elliot, you’re a close second); in fact, though Persuasion has persuasively stolen my heart, I really think Pride and Prejudice is actually the best, funniest, and most entertaining of all of Austen’s novel...which is probably why it’s so, sooooo widely adapted.

Hearing that there was another adaption of Pride and Prejudice was kind of like hearing that the Italian men’s national soccer team had flopped to excess again in international league play.  Hearing that it was written by the wryly amused and perceptive Curtis Sittenfeld, and set in Cincinnati, Ohio (a great spot I’ve visited, but not necessarily one of the sexiest places to set a romantic novel, yaknow? But then again, neither was Milwaukee, so maybe the Midwest is onto something?) however, perked my ears right up. This did not smell like an Armani scented flop!   And you guys.  IT WASN’T.

Pad Thai Salad Dressing (aka Peanut Lime Dressing)

I will confess that this dish came around after a rather weird and intense craving for sprouts. All I can guess is that it was hot, I had been up since 4am for a flight, I wanted pad thai but I didn't want hot pad thai, I wanted peanuts, I had a lot of veggies to eat, and I wanted crunchy things.  Not fussy at all, right? It took trips to not one, not two, but THREE grocery stores (way to fail hard, Central Square), because one store was out of one thing, another store was out of the other, and you get the idea.  

The only recipe I've included here is for the dressing, mostly because I hope that I live in a world where people old enough to wield kitchen knives can make their own decisions about what to put into their own salads, even if we can agree on nothing else.  I chose to test using bean sprouts in lieu of noodles, but you can easily go big and use them instead, but I'd recommend chilled regardless.  I also threw some shredded radishes and carrots, tomatoes, red peppers, baked tofu (or should I say overbaked tofu...turns out letting it cleverly cool in the oven is not actually clever), baby spinach and kale, avocado, and love.  That last one is key, you guys.  I suspect this would also taste great with napa cabbage, and probably anything else you want to coat with this dressing, which is the real winner, aside from you when you make and eat this.  For reference, depending on your dressing amount preference, I'd say this makes enough for 4-6 dinner-sized salads; it stores well, but you may need to thin it with H2O!  Invite a friend over, pair this with your favorite summer beverage, mischief managed.

Pad Thai (Peanut Lime) Salad Dressing

Dressing for 4-6 dinner-sized salads

Pad Thai Salad Dressing (Peanut Lime Dressing)/Clean Plate Club